Sunday, October 4, 2015


My Dear Son:

We speak of ourselves as being blindsided when we do not anticipate or see an event coming. This nature of this event may be a physical accident. Or it can be an unexpected, unpleasant encounter with another person.

Most cars have blind spots, or areas where we are unable to see oncoming traffic. Before cars, mule- or horse-driven wagons would often outfit the beast of burden with blinders, or tack that would keep the animal from being distracted or frightened by oncoming traffic.

All of these examples have one idea in common: the inability to see an upcoming or oncoming event. At first glance, being prevented or unable to anticipate upcoming events goes counter to our instincts for survival and our attempts to avoid potentially physically dangerous or painful stimuli. But it's been my experience that these blindsided encounters can also deliver a hefty amount of emotional agony, as well.

Part of the problem is, situations like this may make us feel inadequate, gullible, or just plain stupid. And most of us, whether we claim it or not, have a certain affinity toward maintaining our personal pride and dignity. So when you run up against circumstances that challenge you with ya didn't see it coming, did ya? a fair lot of us will run screaming the opposite direction white-knuckling our wounded pride. That's really not necessary, given there are ways not only to see it coming, but to accept with inner graciousness why we never saw it coming. More later.

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